I wanted to be confident but then I had my doubts

Dearest Bold Soul,
You are awesome and beautiful – delight made human – and I hope you know that beyond a doubt x o x o

^^ That is the artwork from one of my free bookmarks. ^^ Download yourself a copy if you haven’t yet; it’s a nice reminder when you tuck it inside your book, just before resting your head for sleep!

I’ve been wanting and trying to pin down a Word of the Year for 2012. I so enjoyed having the word “Blossom” last year or the year before. However, a word has not fallen into place for me – yet. I’ve been fussing and tussling and tangling with it like it’s a wordy octopus and I’m a blade wielding, lightly leaping pirate (completely calmly and zen-ly, of course).

I have the boots already!

Seriously though, this is quite a personal process that I’m sharing here, so please be sympathetic if you leave a comment (and I’d love it if you did).

Here’s how it’s been playing out, so far:

I guess there are no Official Life Rules of Having a Word of the Year, right?

Can I have a phrase? Yes, I believe I can.

I am adopting “I Am Enough” for such time that feels right!

Maybe the Word of my year is Enough. Oh. Wow.

Writing this reminds me how many times in my life and lately I’ve been attracted by the concept of “Enough”. Have you watched the Brene Brown TED talk on vulnerability? I recommend its solid goodness, it’s worth making 20 minutes to watch.

I felt very strongly when the kids were younger, that I wanted to make sure they knew the idea of “enough”. I would ask, “More? Or is that enough?”

When I was learning to teach, one of my favourite teachers would say to a child being ‘naughty’: “That’s Enough!” I liked what it meant: it was clear the behaviour had to stop, but the child was not ‘wrong’.


I am enough.

I have enough.

There is enough.

I’ve had enough! *foot stomping*

So what’s going to happen? Ideally I would boldly go (hum the theme with me) to a world and reality where I feel like I Am Enough; I think I’m going to like it there.

There’s Gratitude.

Not a lack of striving, but a knowing that what you need to create you can, and are indeed ‘made’ to create – created to create! It’s very doable. “Enough” brings Confidence (one of the hot contenders for Word of the Year as I pondered it late last year. Haha, ’til I lost my courage!) This puzzle is maybe fitting together… or not?

I am enough. You are enough. Haha, together we are more than enough! :D

Hey, if we are Enough, I believe we give ourselves Permission To Shine! Love this song, it’s so fortifying and lifting! If the embed doesn’t work here’s a link :)

Other considerations:

I have a sense this year will have an increase in the amount of music and bicycle riding in it. Sounds random, I guess, but I’m sure those are positive tendencies!

Now that I am so much weller, perhaps the learning and efforts from whilst my thyroid was struggling, can be put into practice. That deterioration really changed my ability to cope with my days. The way I could think. The amount I could do. The excessive levels of muddle and brain cloud, probably depression and certainly frustration. Have you had thyroid troubles, ever, bold soul?
Now that I am out of it I can see how much it impacted me. And how much it sucked. Thankfully, I guess I didn’t fully realise at the time just how much I was struggling. I’m SO grateful to be out of it, finding energy, clarity of thought, stamina and confidence I had not known for I’m not sure how long. (Haha, Life: what’s my next challenge?)

I’m going to say, confidently, that Confidence is my word of the year, with a side of extra bicycle-riding and music. Lovely, I like that.

That fits really well. As we have been rearranging things in the big declutter (still in progress) the piano is much more accessible and I’ve been tinkering around on it. Also, I bought my son an acoustic guitar which he’s tinkering on. My hands seem to stretch well enough for piano but find it difficult to wrap around the guitar neck and press the strings. However, I’ve digressed.

In confident conclusion:

Confidence. I’m trying it on. In fact, even if it doesn’t turn out to be the spinal, driving essence of my year (haha, or the rest of it at least) I’m confident that another word or phrase will make itself apparent!

And that makes me feel boldly, shiningly enough. Hummm :)

Sweet everythings to you, Bold Soul de la Lovely;
Love Meg x o


I wanted to be confident but then I had my doubts — 2 Comments

  1. yes re thyroid – need to try to understand it.
    Yes: re a phrase is fine – I did that one year and it worked well.
    I love that you haven’t found your word til now and give yourself permission to be okay with that. I found a word and have completely forgotten it so I guess it wasn’t THE word and thus I, too, am still looking.


    • Hi Tammy :)
      The thyroid is a tricky little butterfly, isn’t it? It affects so many systems, well – everything I guess!
      Sounds like you’ve given yourself permission too, to find it when you find it, lose it if it escapes. Good luck with your discernment. Let’s know when you catch one!
      By the way, Tammy, before this post did you get an email with 8-10 posts all at once?
      Love M x o

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